No Longer Waiting For Raina

3.13.11

2011-03-14T16:19:00.001-05:00

Dedication Day

2010-02-22T20:02:00.005-06:00

On Sunday, February 21st, Raina was dedicated at our church. For the occasion, Laura put her in the world's most adorable dress. She was an instant hit... and the pictures speak for themselves. On an obviously more important note, it was an incredible blessing to be able to stand in front of the congregation and recognize Raina as an official part of our family. She is truly the most precious gift from God and it was a privilege to make the commitment publicly to raise her in a manner that will please Him, with the prayerful hope that one day she will understand Jesus' love for her. We praise Him daily for her life.

Welcome To Holland

2010-02-20T07:13:00.010-06:00

I know it's been a long time since I've posted, but since we were just given some concrete dates for Raina's upcoming treatment, I figured I'd let Laura share some things from her heart. I do love her so much, and when I get to see her in her role as a mother on a daily basis, I fall even more in love with her. The following are Laura's words.

As most of you know, we will be seeking medical care for Raina at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital. The surgeons at the Colorectal Center are known worldwide for their pioneering work and research in children with anorectal malformations. Therefore, there is no question in our minds that Cincinnati is the best place for Raina to be. We are blessed to have insurance that allows us to seek medical care at whatever institution we desire, even to travel out of state. We have received conformation of our itinerary and we'll be heading to Cincinnati on March 9-12. Raina will be undergoing many tests while there, including a few in the OR under anesthesia to determine what exactly is going on with her and the best treatment of care for her future. A date has not been set for her initial surgery yet. They will give us their first available OR time. We will be meeting with the colorectal surgeon, Dr. Levitt, whom we already love though we have never met him. Raina will be seen by a urologist and a pediatric gynecologist in the OR as well. Writing all of this makes my mommy heart hurt. I hate all that she will endure and I ask for your prayers for her and for us as a family as we walk this road together. I have enclosed a reading below that someone gave to me a while back. It is something I read often…especially on the days when I am feeling sorry for myself for my apparent lack of freedom and when I am overwhelmed by colostomy bags and endless therapy sessions. It helps me to put things into perspective again and makes me remember why I am Raina’s mom.

WELCOME TO HOLLAND By Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with special needs and disabilities- to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It’s like this… When you are going to have a baby, whether biologically or through adoption, it’s like planning a fabulous trip- to ITALY! You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Colliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting. After months or years of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go! Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome to Holland." “ Holland ?!?” you say. “What do you mean Holland??? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy! All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy!” But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It’s just a different place. So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It’s just a different place. It’s slower-paced that Italy , less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while you catch your breath, you look around… and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills… and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts. But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy… and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned. “And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away… because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss. But…if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things… about Holland.

In our adoption journey, would it have been easier to go to Italy??? Less stressful??? Less painful??? To all of those questions, I answer most definitely YES!!! But, God in His infinite wisdom and beauty knew that we needed to go to Holland. And if we hadn’t, I would have missed out on the beauty in my daughter’s smile, the joy behind her giggles, and the ultimate heart-melting experience of having her grab my face with her tiny hands and say “Wo ai ni!” - (which means I Love You in Chinese). Yes, Holland is beautiful too and I thank God for the privilege of allowing me to go there. With love to you all, Laura

One Month Home... The Scoop So Far

2009-12-06T14:21:00.008-06:00

One month ago today, we flew home from China. As cliche' as it may sound, I can't believe it's been a whole month. So much has happened in this past month, so I figured I'd catch you up on some of it. I guess I'll begin with a synopsis of the medical conditions that Raina is facing.

Raina was born with a defect that is called congenital anal atresia (sometimes termed imperforate anus). During her fetal development, her colon failed to fully descend and connect to the rectum. As a result, she was given a temporary colostomy in her upper abdomen probably within a day or so of her birth. This was done so that an exit could be established for waste. The second stage of the process would be to create an anus (anoplasty), and correctly build her lower intestine to the outside of her body. After healing, the colostomy could then be reversed. None of these subsequent surgeries took place, and she was found abandoned just before her first birthday. Within the orphanage setting, they were not equipped with the resources to help her further. So she still has her colostomy which we care for on a daily basis. Shortly after coming home, a battery of tests were conducted on her (which you can read about in my previous post). The conclusion of some of these test results threw us all for a loop, as we discovered that Raina has quite a bit more wrong on the inside than we were aware of. She was born with a minor heart defect (VSD), which seems (at least for the time being) to be functional... meaning, they would simply like to monitor her every six months to see if any changes take place in her heart that would require something further (like a surgical repair). This was a small victory, and one in which we thank God for. In a total shocker, it was determined that Raina has only one kidney. This information became of extreme importance to us because of the fact that she was originally diagnosed as having a fistula (connection) between her intestine and her bladder. With the possibility of infection and potential damage to her renal system through this fistula, her one kidney must be protected at all costs. Thankfully, the urinalysis has shown that her kidney and her bladder are normal, with no signs of damage at this point. This was again, another bit of great news... it seems that God has protected her precious kidney thus far. We are certainly "hyper-aware" of what we see in her diaper, and we have had a few scares. So, needless to say, we are anxious to have the experts at Cincinnati Children's look into this further. The next thing we learned has to do with Raina's skeletal design. She was born without the lower 3 segments of her sacrum and her coccyx (the bottom of the spinal column and tailbone). This is evident when you look at her body structure. This could become a critical component of her future in many ways. The spinal cord runs the length of the spinal column, with the bottom most part serving the nerves for bladder and bowel control. At this point, it is undetermined how much of these nerve endings are in place for Raina. From an orthopedics standpoint, she may also have future issues with the development of her hips and pelvis as she grows. We were not able to get a very clear analysis of her reproductive system, so there are many question marks surrounding that as well. As the pieces of this puzzle began to fall into place, it became more abundantly clear that Raina has the signs of what is called VACTERL association. In a nutshell, VACTERL is an acronym, not a disease or a syndrome. It is used to describe the types of anomalies (physical birth defects) children may have when they are born. A child with three or more of these specific anomalies in any combination may be recognized as fitting the VACTERL Association. The specific needs of each child who has VACTERL vary from child to child, as well as the severity of the anomalies. Examples of the anomalies that may occur are:

(V) - Vertebrae problems - abnormally formed vertebrae, tethered spinal cord, extra ribs, missing ribs and tailbone, etc.
(A) - Anal anomalies/rectal problems - no anal opening.
(C) - Cardiac problems - minor to massive heart problems.
(T) - Trachea (windpipe) - improper connections between trachea and esophagus.
(E) - Esophagus - part of the esophagus connecting the mouth and stomach is missing.
(R) - Renal (kidney) - abnormal kidney(s).
(L) - Limb - various hand, feet and leg problems, missing bone structures are common.
Excerpt taken from vacterlnetwork.org.

Raina has the V, A, C, and R of the acronym. After shedding our fair share of tears regarding her situation, we have settled on the realization that although this has proven a huge surprise to us, none of this has been unknown to God. He has been aware of her needs all along, and was just waiting to place Raina into our family. We are overjoyed at the fact that this incredible little girl is a part of us now. In a very short time, the Lord has given us renewed perspective. Now, that's not to say, that along with the joy, we will not experience the darkness that is to come also. We are no different than any other family that has a child with special needs. It is a roller coaster that has hills, peaks, dips, turns, spins, loops, corkscrews, and dark tunnels. Yes, it's true... we are not the same family that we were before... but we are much better now that Raina's here. With all the challenges that our futures hold together, we must remain convinced that He will never leave us or forsake us... that He is faithful... that He knows what He is doing... and that He will be glorified through our circumstances. I'm sure that there will be days when it won't be nearly as easy for me to type those words. But He is enough... He HAS to be enough. Our friend, Carol Shrader, (who exemplifies this truth beautifully) has become something of a hero in our eyes - a true inspiration of character and strength. God's blessings are hugely evident in her family's life, and, although it may be from a far away distance, we are thankful for her humble influence on our lives.

Other than that, we have been enjoying getting to know Raina. She is a total delight most of the time. She has begun to settle into somewhat of a decent sleeping pattern. She eats almost everything we give to her. She has started to say some English words (mama, bye-bye, bubbles, banana, baby, eyes, nose, toes, blocks, shoes - just to name a few) and her laugh is downright infectious. She has become a hit everywhere we go - people just can't get enough of her beautiful face. And neither can we...

One Week Already

2009-11-14T21:47:00.003-06:00

Well it's been one week home already, and we can hardly believe where the time has gone. A little synopsis: Raina began her time at home here completely messed up with the time change. She thought that bedtime was more like 4am instead of 9pm. This proved extremely challenging to our transition back to homelife since our exhaustion level hit an unprecedented high. Coupled with the time-out-of-whack, was the world's most raging ear infection in her left ear. Turns out, she has a ruptured eardrum, for which we have her on a double antibiotic to heal. Our pediatrician said it's one of the nastiest he's ever seen, which we thought was oh so special. We pray she does not experience any hearing loss from this. She has spent the week getting to know Evan and Colin (she has taken to them both very well). And we've discovered that Raina has one incredible appetite, for which we are thrilled. She is figuring things out in her own time - and considering all the changes she has been through in the previous 3 weeks, we feel she is adjusting extremely well. She has been a wonderful addition to our family, and we still pinch ourselves that she's really here. Friday was her initial pediatrician appointment for a full examination. A plan has been developed to begin her first testing - pelvic and sacral spinal MRI, kidney and bladder ultrasound, EKG and Echocardiogram, and a full urinalysis (which will all be performed next week at the University of Chicago). When the results of these initial tests are in, we will be traveling to Cincinnati Children's Hospital to consult with their Pediatric Colorectal team, as the focus of Raina's surgeries will be performed there. Our pediatrician, as well as Dr. Levitt's team in Cincinnati, have been encouraging to us. We are fully aware of the potential future that Raina faces - the best case and worst case scenarios. Although there are many unknowns regarding her condition, we are moving forward in the confidence that she can and will be helped. I realize that I have not delved into the full details of Raina's condition (which I will attempt to clarify when the official plan is in place). I feel it will be more appropriate to share when I can clearly lay out the steps ahead, without resorting to speculation. Until then, we are simply a happy family of 5 learning to live with each other. Yes, we're tired. Yes, we've been frustrated. But no, we wouldn't change it for the world. Because when you love each other as much as we do... that's just the way it is.

Coming Home

2009-11-04T07:40:00.001-06:00

Well, this will be my last blog posting while in China. Tomorrow we will make our final jaunt to Hong Kong, followed by a quick turnaround flight to Chicago. Today we had our appointment at the US Consulate in Guangzhou where we took the oath, and our adoption of Raina was officially recognized by the US Government. Upon landing at O'Hare airport, Raina will be granted her US citizenship, and the process will be complete. There is a sadness in leaving here. We've made friends... lasting relationships. It seems almost surreal that it's ending. All the waiting, all the planning, all the anticipating... it's finally over. When those wheels touch down on Chicago ground, Raina's new life will begin - an American life. Although we have only known her such a short time, she is one of the most incredible people we have ever known. We would give our lives for her, our precious daughter. And there is a whole group of other people whose lives have been changed forever also. The picture above is of our travel group. Every one of the people in this photo have a story to tell. Every one of these little children will touch countless lives when they return to the US. The miracle of adoption reaches far and wide... from the cities of America to the villages of China... the Hand of God at work amongst the people of the world. We say this all the time, but I'll say it again: If you would've told me 5 years ago that I'd be blogging from the other side of the globe with the most beautiful 2 year old little Chinese girl sleeping gently in the bed beside us, I would've told you "You're crazy". But that's what God does - He changes your world. Sometimes it's scary, sometimes it's exhilarating. But it's ALWAYS what's best. So there it is... The Curatolo family... coming home... no longer waiting... for Raina.

More Pictures... What Else?

2009-11-03T18:57:00.001-06:00

We have had a lot of free time here in Guangzhou (sometimes it seems like too much), and at this point we are just looking forward to getting back home to the US. The paperwork that was filed with the US Consulate takes a few days to process, so we are in a holding period. We have our appointment before the officials on Wednesday the 4th - where we will be "taking the final oath" regarding our intentions in adoption. Until then, without much to post, (other than another pic of the beautiful White Swan) I figured I'd post the most important thing I could think of... more pictures of Raina. Enjoy.

The Red Couch

2009-11-01T07:07:00.000-06:00

Today was a somewhat slow day with only a little official business to attend to. We had all our US Consulate paperwork to go over, which took some time - but the real event of the day took place this morning. It was time for the famous "Red Couch" photos to be taken here at the White Swan. In the lobby of the hotel, there is a red couch where pictures are taken of all the adopted children. This has become something like a right-of-passage for all families staying here. Traditionally, families dress their children in Chinese clothing, and we just couldn't resist following along with this. Raina looked simply delightful in the little China dress we bought for her. All the children in our travel group took pictures together - all dressed up in their cute China clothes. Completely... adorable.

Guangzhou - The White Swan

2009-10-31T07:43:00.003-05:00

After a long day of travel, we made it to Guangzhou - the final leg of our trip. The US Consulate is in the city of Guangzhou, so that makes this the last stop for all American families adopting from China. We landed late, and made it to our hotel - the infamous White Swan. It has been a pleasant reuniting with the families from our travel group. This hotel and area is a hotbed for American adoptive families, so it's a very welcome place. There are families that look like ours absolutely everywhere - it's almost commonplace - VERY refreshing. We have a beautiful view from our room at night. Although we were definitely spoiled by the amazing Lakeside Hotel in Fuzhou, the White Swan is certainly nice. After a quick night's sleep - (too quick), we were up early for Raina's medical exam. This process is basically a formality that all families must go through to receive a doctor's seal-of-approval. Raina received a TB test also, due to the fact that she is over 2 years old. We enjoyed a little shopping this afternoon, followed by a great dinner with the entire travel group. This was a wonderful time of just being together - great conversation, great food, great company. Yep, we are glad to be in Guangzhou. Back to the White Swan, where we enjoyed another evening of cute Raina mischief. Although at times she can test us with just how far her little toddler limits can take her, she is still our dream come true.

Fuzhou Free Day 3

2009-10-29T23:39:00.004-05:00

Yep... that's right... free day number 3 here in Fuzhou. This also marks the halfway point of our time here in China. So it's downhill from here. We had only one main excursion today - to the Fuzhou Panda World Museum and Research Center. Panda bears obviously come from China, with the majority of them living in Western China. There are only about 1000 panda bears living in the world today, so the government of China has set up panda research centers in various provinces throughout the country. Seeing the pandas up close was a real treat - they are beautiful creatures. Raina enjoyed watching them as well as what is known as the "lesser" pandas - a smaller raccoon/cat type panda with huge paws. The lesser pandas did a performance show for us that was so cute - we all enjoyed it. After Panda World, we did a little shopping, followed by some lunch. Then back at the hotel, another hysterical discovery: upon seeing a reflection of light on the ceiling from a small mirror, Raina couldn't get enough of it. For some reason, she would try to "blow" out the light like a candle. Watching her puff out her lips and blow sent us in to completely hilarious laughter. She is the cutest thing on earth. We took our daily afternoon walk on the boardwalk outside our hotel, and it was beautiful as usual. Although we have thoroughly enjoyed Fuzhou, we are anxious to get to Guangzhou so we can reunite with our travel group. Being the only caucasian couple with a Chinese child has provided us with some awkward moments. Our guide Isabel (whom we simply adore) informed us that very few adoptions take place out of the Fujian province - only 92 in the year 2008. She told us that many of the Chinese people here do not even know that international adoption exists, so they are puzzled when they see us. Isabel gets asked questions by the people when we are out with her. We've been stared at, pointed at, and talked about. It has made for some uncomfortable moments, but we just press on. As we prepare to leave Fuzhou, we do so with a level of sadness. Leaving here will pull us one step further away from Raina's heritage, the only home she's ever known. We grieve with sorrow for her birthmother. Although we will never know her, we thank God for her bravery - to make, undoubtedly, the most difficult decision of her life - to give up her child for a hope at a brighter future that she could never provide. She does not know that by doing so, she has given us the most precious gift - our beautiful daughter. We are so thankful for Raina's caregivers and her orphanage doctor. We are grateful that they not only took care of her needs, but that they truly cared for her. And most of all, we thank the Lord for His beautiful gift of life displayed in the eyes of Raina... she is our little angel.

Fuzhou Free Day 2

2009-10-28T18:10:00.001-05:00

Today was another day of free-time touring. First we visited the memorial home of Lin Zexu (1785-1850), who was a Chinese scholar and official during the Qing Dynasty. He is recognized as a national hero for his stance and fight against the opium trade in Guangzhou at the time. Because of his "high moral ground", he is generally considered a role model for moral government, especially by the Chinese people. We toured a memorial created for him, and visited a Tea House opened in celebration of his life. We were treated to a demonstration of the art of tea service in China. Eloquent hand gestures, sweeping pouring motions, specific tasting techniques, even the posturing of the fingers... all very important to the "right" way to enjoy tea. Fujian's mountains make it the number one producing province of tea in China... they are serious about tea here. We then made our way to the West Fuzhou Buddhist Temple, a breathtaking campus of wonder. Dating back 1200 years, the Buddhist buildings and pagodas are simply beautiful to see. Serene grounds, quiet and simple walking paths through trees and rivers - contrasted with giant temple structures of bright color. Although watching the monks and people worshiping left us with a slightly empty feeling, we were amazed at the beauty of the place. After leaving the temple, we had our guide Isabel do us a huge favor. We had her order PAPA JOHN'S for us! We picked it up on the way back to our hotel, and we ate American pepperoni pizza and drank Coke right there in our room. Pure American food heaven. Believe me, as far as food goes, we are really looking forward to getting back to the US. Adventurous in Chinese cuisine... we are not. Trust me, this ain't Panda Express over here. We had a good evening together enjoying Raina's personality... she is really the cutest thing on earth. I got her to explode with giggling by doing the simplest little things, like tossing little finger puppets in the air and letting them land on my head. Her laughter is one of the most glorious sounds we've ever heard. So there you have it... Fuzhou free day number 2 in the books.

Fuzhou Free Day 1

2009-10-27T07:00:00.001-05:00

After a busy day of paperwork yesterday, we've entered into a period of 3 straight "free days". This morning, our guide Isabel treated us with a visit to a beautiful park located across the lake from our hotel. We had a wonderful walk along the boardwalk with Raina in her stroller. She quickly fell asleep and we enjoyed a great stroll through the park. It was a very nice time outside in absolutely gorgeous weather. All in all, we had a "lazy" day without much going on. Raina has taken to looking out the window of our hotel room. And a new hilarious development... Raina must have her shoes on at all times. Even with her pajamas on, she puts them on. She's not happy when they're off. We also discovered that, although we were told that Raina weighs 27 pounds - well... um... we put her on the scale - she's a whopping 18 pounds. She is the littlest peanut, just wait till you see her. She may just be a Curatolo after all...

She's Officially Ours!

2009-10-26T19:11:00.002-05:00

Today was a full day for us. Today was the day that we had to complete the official process of adopting Raina in her province. The Chinese officials granted us legal guardianship for 24 hours (from the time we met her) to make a final decision. This is designed to give the adoptive family and the authorities an opportunity to confirm the match through mutual agreement. We knew that the first stop of our trip today would be the one we were dreading the most, since we would have to again see Raina's caretakers from her orphanage, as they would be required to be at the meeting. So first, we went to the Fuzhou Civil Affairs office (kind of like a little courthouse... emphasis on the "little"... yet very official). There, we signed many documents, placed our thumbprints (Raina's footprint) on their seals, and were interviewed by the higher ranking officer about our reasons for adopting Raina and our intentions of providing for her life from this point on. This was surprisingly a very nerve-racking experience and we felt a lot of cultural pressure entering the interview. We did see her orphanage workers again, and our fears were realized when Raina wanted to go with her Nanny. This was shorter-lived than the day before though. Signed, sealed, delivered... RAINA IS OFFICIALLY OUR DAUGHTER! We took a final picture with the officials, and we headed off to apply for Raina's passport and US Visa. This was a quick visit without much fanfare, and then we were on our way to the Fuzhou Notary Public Office to notarize and get verification that we are who we say we are. Another official interview where we were asked about our intentions in adopting one of China's children. With this, we were off to a good old-fashioned American visit to McDonald's and Wal-Mart. One final cab ride back to the hotel, and then we were in for the surprise of the day... with a little patience, Raina came out of her shell big time. She was drinking from a bottled water, and coughed a little. We laughed and she thought our laughing was funny. This started about a 20 minute episode of "fake" coughing and total giggling. To watch her interact with us this way was simply priceless. We finally got to see her real smiles and hear her glorious little laugh. It was heaven.

We...Have...Raina.

2009-10-25T17:19:00.001-05:00

Well, this is the blog posting we've been waiting to share for almost 3 years. We are in a hotel room in Fuzhou, Fujian province, China. And sitting in the bed with us is our precious Raina. She is the most beautiful thing we've ever seen. This day has been incredible... impossible to put into words that will ever do it justice. We met her in a hotel meeting room, and it was one of the most memorable moments of our lives. After taking care of some paperwork, we were back in our hotel room with her, and 3 representatives from her orphanage - the director, her main nanny, and the orphanage doctor. They were wonderful people. We spoke to them through our guide, who interpreted for us all. They presented us with gifts, clothes, shoes, and a photo album they made of her life there. This orphanage REALLY cared for her, we can tell. After they left, Raina went through a very difficult - heartbreaking time. She cried a life-shattering wail that rocked us all. She is grieving yet another abandonment from the orphanage that is the only life she remembers. Laura just held her tight for at least an hour as Raina clinged to her. Her sorrow slowly turned to anger, yet when she wanted "down", and Laura put her down, she reached out her arms for Laura even through her tears. After awhile, I began to distract her with some toys, and she warmed to the idea of playing. We ordered room service, and we have now sat in the bed for almost 2 hours. Raina has eaten crackers, Gerber puffs, dried fruit, fried rice, french fries, and she's drank Apple juice from a sippy cup, and milk from a straw. She has already exhibited amazing skill at stacking cups, fine detail, - we are simply amazed at her in every way possible. She is a glorious gift from God, and we are busting at the seams just looking at her. Glory to God, blessed be His name... Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow. We're looking at one right here.

Hutong, Forbidden City, Tiananmen Square

2009-10-24T08:46:00.001-05:00

Today we had another long day of touring. What we saw were some of the most amazing things we've ever seen. The simplicity of the Hutongs, an area of Beijing that represents the "old" China... the forgotten past. Where the streets are narrow, and life is quiet - almost peaceful. Then the stark contrast of the Forbidden City... where extravagance reigns. The home built for the Emporer, on display - opulent, overkill, almost ridiculous in size and design. Complete the tour with Tiananmen Square... vast, open, empty space stretching in all directions. Mao's vision in the tangible world. The power of the state ruling over the insignificance of the people - Pure China. All unforgettable... but what lies ahead for us tomorrow will be the most unforgettable moment of our entire trip - our meeting with Raina. This is a moment we've dreamed of for so long... just in time to shatter Mao's dream. Raina is not insignificant... we came here from the other side of the world for this one very important girl. An orphan no longer...

1st Day - The Great Wall

2009-10-23T06:01:00.000-05:00

After a fairly decent night's sleep, this morning we toured what is called a "Cloissone" factory, where they manufacture works of art from copper and colored enamel. Witnessing the process was amazing, from the beginnings of the basic materials to the final steps of polishing - a truly beautiful art. We then went to the Great Wall of China. The weather was absolutely beautiful, we couldn't have asked for anything better. We took a cable car up the side of the mountain to an entrance spot where they funnel the tourists. We then climbed some incredibly steep angles and stairs to the highest point. The view was one of the most spectacular things I've ever seen. It was amazing to see the majesty of the mountains peeking through the haze, and to look at the dragon-like wall snaking in both directions as far as the eye can see. Standing there upon this wondrous man-made structure gave me the sense of just how small we are. It's easy to feel insignificant on that wall... the history, the shear magnitude of it... it's quite humbling. We then went to lunch, where we were treated to some... eh, let's just say very interesting "meats". Laura and I weren't feeling that adventurous (shocker), so the rice and chicken did the job just fine. Back to the hotel for a quiet evening, one of the last ones we'll probably have for awhile.

Here We GO!

2009-10-20T22:35:00.003-05:00

Tomorrow we will be boarding a plane bound for Beijing. A flight that we sometimes thought would never take place is finally going to happen. A whirlwind of emotions is swirling through our heads. We are exhausted already... all the planning, packing, last minute details... it's all done, and we are ready to go. Saying goodbye to our boys has proved difficult. 17 days is an AWFUL long time to be away from them. We will miss them desperately. But this new chapter of our lives is about to begin, and we want to savor every moment of it. I hope you enjoy the ride with us... now let's get going!

Travel Itinerary

2009-10-15T22:34:00.004-05:00

Today we received our official itinerary for our in-China travel. It basically gives a detailed schedule of where we will be, and the things we will be doing on a daily basis. It looks like there's some exciting things for us to see and do, as well as a good amount of down time... just waiting for appointments. In a nutshell, it breaks down like this: We fly out of Chicago on Wednesday, October 21st - landing in Beijing on Thursday, October 22nd. We spend Friday and Saturday touring Beijing (I can't wait for that!). Sunday morning, we fly from Beijing to Fuzhou, the capital of the Fujian province. THAT SAME AFTERNOON, WE WILL BE RECEIVING RAINA! So, October 25th is what is affectionately referred to as "Gotcha Day". Monday the 26th, we have some official adoption appointments. Tuesday is a "free" day for us. Wednesday and Thursday we will be doing some more touring of the Fujian province. Friday the 30th, we will receive our final adoption documents from Raina's province and late that same evening we will take a flight from Fuzhou to Guangzhou. This is where the famous White Swan hotel is, and this is where we will spend the remainder of our time in China, doing all sorts of official adoption things. The schedule takes on a busier form here in Guangzhou. We will have medical appointments, visa appointments, and US consolate appointments every day beginning Saturday, 10/31 thru Thursday, 11/5. We then take our final in-country flight from Guangzhou to Hong Kong sometime after 11pm Thursday night (undoubtedly the toughest flight due to how late it is). We will spend our final night/early Friday morning (11/6) in a beautiful Hong Kong hotel before we prepare for our final 13+hour flight home to Chicago, a mere 11 hours later.
Without question, this will be the MOST demanding travel of our entire lives, with a 2 year old in tow. Pray for Raina, and pray for our endurance. We need to stay healthy... this is very important.

What A SURPRISE!

2009-10-13T16:20:00.008-05:00

This past Friday night was a night that I will surely never forget. Under the impression we were going over to some friends' house for dinner, we were greeted at their door along with a screaming chorus of "SURPRISE!!!". Our very dear friends (the Leistra's and the Shelby's) succeeded in throwing us a TOTAL surprise shower for Raina. They had planned this for about a month, secretly registered us at Target, sent out invitations to a huge number of our friends and family, and pulled off what I consider to be one awesome event. We were completely blown away by it... overwhelmed at the love and committment that these loved ones showed toward us and our sweet Raina. It was a joyous time, filled with food, fellowship, and fun. (Not to mention one of the coolest cakes I've ever seen.) The generosity heaped upon us by those so close to us was a great reminder of selfless relationships... giving because you love to give... because you love who you're giving to. A giant THANK YOU to all who were a part of such an amazing night. Raina will someday know just how desperately she is wanted - how incredibly special she is. That night, a good friend told us that she can't wait to meet Raina, because it will be the closest she can come to meeting Jesus on this earth. Her explanation was simple - Matthew 25:37-40 (The Message) - "Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry and feed you, thirsty and give you a drink? And when did we ever see you sick or in prison and come to you?' Then the King will say, 'I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me."

2 Weeks To Go

2009-10-07T21:54:00.002-05:00

Two more weeks... Man, the time is flying. We are reaching the final stages of our preparation. We still feel like we have about a gazillion things to do before we leave, but we're slowly getting there. We're checking things off our list and taking care of details. We've spoken to a few doctors this week about Raina's medical treatment when we return. They are beginning to develop a tentative plan for her initial care which will involve much testing before anything can be officially determined. Our anxiety level is rising as we anticipate going. Lately my new prayer has been that the Lord will grant us His peace through the difficult times that lay ahead. That we will lean on Him, and on Him only. Please pray for our family. Pray for our travel, and for our boys who will remain home while we're gone - 17 days is an excruciatingly long time to be away from them. And pray for Raina... pray for her EVERY time you think of it.

Hope Is Like The Sun...

2009-10-03T23:30:00.005-05:00

October 3rd. Three years ago today was a very dark day in our family. A tragic loss. Little did we know that it would set us on a course that would change our future. How could we have known? We couldn't. What sense did it make? None. But funny how God's wisdom shows up in the unexpected. Laura has a little "flip"-type calendar... you know the type. Each day you flip to a new page, and on each new page there's a saying or quote of some sort. Well, on this 3rd day of October - a date that, as the sun rises, brings with it the pangs of sorrow - these are the words that spilled off the page of the calendar as we flipped to today: "Hope is like the sun, which, as we journey toward it, casts the shadow of our burden behind us." Indeed... what a picture in words. Our God certainly has a way of using the simple things in life, like a little calendar. These words were written by a man named Samuel Smiles. And I hope he doesn't mind if I make the slightest change to his profound thought. Here's mine: "Hope is like the SON, which as we journey toward Him, casts the shadow of our burden behind us." Oh, yes indeed... what a picture in those words.

One Month From Today

2009-09-21T21:55:00.003-05:00

Exactly one month from today, we will be boarding a plane for China. Thus will begin the final leg of an exhausting, yet life-fulfilling journey. We have begun to get aquainted with our travel-mates. 4 families from Bethany will be traveling together... One from the Detroit area, one from the St. Louis area, one from nearby northwest Indiana, and us from the Chicago area. We will be meeting together here in Chicago and flying out of O'Hare non-stop to Beijing. The details are falling into place, and the excitement is building now. It's difficult to describe, but I keep getting this picture in my head. There was a day when I gave my life to Jesus Christ, and on that day He called me his child... an orphan no longer. Oh, how we long to say those words to our sweet Raina.

SWI of Putian City

2009-09-21T21:50:00.003-05:00

To Melissa, (the one who commented that she is also adopting from the SWI of Putian City) - our Raina is indeed from the same orphanage. If you view my profile, you can click the link to send me an email.

We've Got A DATE!

2009-09-17T19:17:00.002-05:00

Yeah, you read it right. Wednesday, October 21st, 2009... we will be flying from Chicago to Beijing, China. The date is set - and we are excited to go! For those of you who have been with us since the beginning of our journey, you know how much this means. To actually have a date somehow makes it so REAL. Just 5 more weeks... and we're outta here. Beautiful Raina, mama & baba are coming...

Test Post For China (w/ Spector Logo)

2009-09-11T12:22:00.001-05:00

This is a test posting to see if I can email my posts into Blogger in China, because the site may be blocked.
jcuratolo.waitingforraina@blogger.com

Update!!!

2009-09-04T14:13:00.006-05:00

We sent a care package to Raina's orphanage last week. We used a service run by a wonderful girl in China named Ann (redthreadchina.com). She put together a little photo album of our family (with pics that I emailed to her) for Raina to have. We also sent a little doll/blanket, and a cute duffle bag for her belongings to bring home when we pick her up. We also asked Ann to try and get any updated information from the orphanage about our little girl. Well, today we received a great email with updated measurements such as: height (33 inches), weight (27.5 lbs), feet size, head & chest size, and how many teeth she has (16 little chompers). Not only are we thrilled with her growth progress, we were also told "She can walk by herself now, she can crawl steps, she can catch water and drink it by herself too!" And... NEW PICTURES! Just as we suspected, since the climate she lives in is similar to Florida, they keep her head buzzed - but we think she is the most adorable thing anyway. Now, we just want to GO, and it shouldn't be too much longer before we know when that will be. Stay glued...

Happy Birthday!

2009-08-30T07:00:00.002-05:00

Today is Raina's birthday. She is 2 years old today. I'm not sure if the orphanage will recognize her birthday... (they might not even know it). But today, we will sing Happy Birthday to this beautiful little girl, we will light some candles and we will eat a few cupcakes in celebration of this little milestone in her life. She won't have any idea that on the other side of the earth, a family she doesn't know yet will be thinking of her on this day. (Well... we think of her every day anyway.) And I can promise you, her next birthday... well let's just say- we're sure she'll remember that one.

Raina's Bedroom

2009-08-29T14:47:00.004-05:00

Thought I'd post a pic of the progress we've made in Raina's room. We just have a few things left to hang on the walls, but other than that... It's finally done. Gotta always hand it to Laura - her color choices never fail. We think our little girl's gonna like it. This sure is a far cry from the Blue & Yellow of the "Michigan" room... We're proud of it.

Chinese Travel Visa

2009-08-28T19:10:00.003-05:00

We went to the Consulate General of the People's Repulic of China in Chicago this morning. We were officially given our Chinese travel visas approving our travel to China. So, when we receive our travel arrangements from the CCAA, we'll be heading out soon. It won't be long now...

Typhoon

2009-08-14T18:30:00.002-05:00

Dwellers clear remains of their houses at Meiyang Village in Zherong County, southeast China's Fujian Province. Typhoon Morakot has killed at least three people and caused direct economic loss of almost 2 billion RMB yuan (292 million U.S. dollars) in Fujian as of Wednesday afternoon, after a powerful landing in east China on Sunday.

After attempting to receive whatever information we could from Bethany's in-China representative, we were told the following: "The typhoon hit the province, but the local government prepared well. The orphanage staff said that we do not need to worry because they have typhoons every year and know what to do. Thank you for checking." This is somewhat reassuring for us, as we were quite concerned about the state of things for the children, their orphanage, and the workers. We pray for their quick recovery efforts, and we hope that this will not affect our impending travel.

Official LOA

2009-08-11T23:02:00.005-05:00

Well, this is the document that says it all. It is the official Letter Of Approval stating that we are the chosen parents to adopt Li Hua Yu. She is our Raina... and we are her family... and printed on this piece of paper that came from China are the words that say it's so. It is the most beautiful piece of paper I've ever seen.

All In The Same Day...

2009-08-10T23:29:00.002-05:00

Well, we've been waiting for our pre-approval since we turned in our LOI (letter of intent) to Grand Rapids about 3 weeks ago. We found out this morning that our PA had arrived at Bethany on July 17th (we just weren't notified). This was excellent news... so imagine our surprise when an hour later our social worker called to tell us that our official LOA (letter of approval) came TODAY! We are officially LOA! This is a tremendous step forward, and one that we certainly didn't expect to come this quickly. This process is in full fast forward mode, which seems strange, since we spent the last 2 1/2 years in a virtual holding pattern. The speed of this is certainly overwhelming, as it may now only be 4-8 weeks until we actually travel to China. We feel overjoyed, yet unprepared - (which I guess is normal). We have much to get ready, and little time for it. But God is faithful - He has known the timeframe of this from the very beginning. Hang on Raina... we're coming sooner than we thought.

Fujian Province

2009-07-22T21:51:00.007-05:00

Raina comes from the Fujian Province, which is located on the southeastern coast of China. Below are some interesting facts about her homeland.

"Fujian is about 46,000 square miles in area (about the size of England), and much of it covered by subtropical vegetation. To the north, west and south mountains form its border, while to the east the province looks some 100 miles across the straits to Taiwan. Fujian's coastline is twisted and complex. Only extending about 310 miles as the crow flies, the coastline in fact meanders in and out and around covering over 1,800 miles, and there are about 1,000 islands off its shores. Fuzhou, Quanzhou and Xiamen are the most important harbors in the province. The proximity to Taiwan has exerted a powerful influence on Fujian.

The Fujian province is divided into eight municipalities: Fuzhou, Xiamen, Zhangzhou, Quanzhou, Putian, Sanming, Nanping, and Longyan, plus Ningde administrative prefecture. Fuzhou is the provincial capital.

Fujian's climate is subtropical maritime, with hot and sticky summers, cool and pleasant autumns and winters. Plentiful rainfall and the backdrop of hills and mountains have produced rivers short and swift. The province is rich in natural resources. More than 100 types of minerals are mined, including tungsten, iron, aluminium and copper. About 40 percent of the province is covered in forest.

Fujian or Min cooking is one of eight 'notable styles' in Chinese cuisine. As Fujian is a coastal province, emphasis is on fish and shellfish, frequently flavored with rice or grain wine.

Fujianese people are said to epitomize Chinese entrepreneurial skills. This is evident in the busy city markets and in the business empires built all over Southeast Asia by Fujian emigrants. The province is the ancestral home of about one-third of the world's overseas Chinese (approximately 20 million) - a direct consequence of its coastal position and long seafaring tradition."

Goodbye To Final Paperwork!

2009-07-20T17:17:00.003-05:00

This morning, Laura dropped off the final paperwork for our acceptance of Raina's referral. It now heads to Grand Rapids for their seal of approval - then on to the CCAA. China should receive it within a week. We then expect little-to-no snags, and our prayer is for a speedy process from here on out. The waiting game continues, but this time... we can see the light, that is coming, for the heart that holds on...

Here She Is...

2009-07-18T09:23:00.003-05:00

Well, here she is. 2 and 1/2 years of waiting, highs and lows like we've never known before, have brought us to now. We have accepted the referral of our precious Raina. She is almost 2 years old, and hopefully by the end of this year, she will be home with us. A new chapter in a very long book has begun... or maybe it's just a whole new book. Certainly untold joys and untold challenges lie ahead, but this one thing we know... we are confident that before time began, God planned for us to know this little girl. Our lives and hers... on separate courses... intersecting in a single moment. Parallel lives joined by the sovereignty of the One who knows what's best for all of us.

What's In A Name?

2009-03-20T22:47:00.006-05:00

Raina, of Spanish origin, pronounced RAY'-nah... meaning "peaceful, queen". Just thought you might be interested.

Changes

2009-03-09T18:21:00.007-05:00

Well, it's been over 6 months since I've updated the blog. I must admit that these past 6 months have been filled with a whole lot of nothing. And it's been somewhat painful and depressing to have absolutely zero to report. It's hard to blog about nothing... I'm not Seinfeld. But, at the same time, something quiet has been stirring in us. Something good. God has had an amazing way of drawing us closer to where we believe He wants us to go. Last August, we filled out our Special Needs paperwork with Bethany, and then promptly waited for an immediate call. As the days fell off the calendar, we felt our time was nearing. As the weeks fell off the calendar, we became more discouraged. As the months fell off the calendar... yeah, you get the picture. Yet, all the while, we could sense that the Lord was doing a work within our hearts - within our lives. He has been preparing us for changes. What those changes are, we still don't know yet. But one thing is certain... He will be glorified. Through whatever means He deems necessary, He will definitely be praised. And if there's one thing the adoption process has taught us, it's that we are NEVER in control of it. The waiting is excruciating. And just when I think He's taken me to my limits, He surprises me with even more. So we were moved to revisit our paperwork. Now, I won't lie and say that we're not ready to be done with this. That we don't want the blessing that we've been so eagerly looking forward to. But EVERY delay, EVERY path, EVERY tunnel, EVERY turn, EVERY detour has been secretly leading us towards Raina. See, we don't believe that there are a bunch of Rainas out there... that she could be just one of many. We have come to believe that there is only ONE Raina. And every "what if", or "could've been" just wasn't her. She waits too. For the ONE family that she's been created for. We stand in confidence on this truth. God has ultimately led us to open our hearts up even further than we could have imagined. This won't be easy. But who ever said it would be? I've always been of the opinion that when you get lost going somewhere, there's always gotta be another way. But sometimes, there's only ONE way to get to where you need to go. And you gotta take THAT next exit... the one that says "Changes". It may be a place that you're not sure you wanna go... but it's the ONLY way there is. HE knows - I've just gotta let Him drive.

One Year

2008-09-04T08:35:00.003-05:00

Well, today marks one year to the day that we were logged-in to China's adoption program. One year of ups... one year of downs... one year of anticipation... one year of heartache. Wow, I can remember looking at the date - 9/4/2007 - with much excitement. And then we waited. And waited. And waited. I don't think that I'll ever be able to explain in human words what this year has been like for us. Only those who have waited for their own adoption journey could possibly understand. And yet, for some reason, we've come to believe that Raina is born, and she has had an unquestionably harder year. One of very little ups... a great many downs... very little hope... and much heartache. But, little does she know that her mom and dad wait here in Chicagoland, USA - desperately clinging to the Hope that she has yet to experience. Hold on little girl... for just a little longer.

Unbelievable

2008-08-10T13:56:00.006-05:00

All expectations blown away - without a doubt, the most amazing spectacle of performance art ever witnessed on such a grand scale. China succeeded in erasing the slate of comparison for Olympic opening ceremonies forever. Completely awe-inspiring, emotionally uplifting - Chinese pride put the pedal to the "medal". Couldn't help but watch with tears - we've finally seen what the country of China has been preparing for for the last decade - all culminating on one glorious night in Beijing. No words to describe the beauty, no where to even begin. Unbelievable.

08-08-08

2008-08-08T12:31:00.003-05:00

Oh, yeah... Let the games begin!

And So We Wait... Again.

2008-08-08T12:11:00.003-05:00

Well, we have officially submitted our COP paperwork to Bethany Grand Rapids, and it has been accepted. As stated in the last posting, we have no idea of knowing any sort of timeframe for this next phase. Part of me suspects that we'll never really be ready for that phone call - No matter when it comes, our lives will immediately be placed upon that turbulent path we've become so familiar with. The other part of me thinks that we've never been more ready for that phone call - No matter when it comes, our lives will immediately be placed upon that wonderful path that we've waited for for so long. It's kind of like my best friend Dan - he has a turbulent, yet wonderful path ahead of him. Will he ever really be ready for what lies ahead? Who knows. In the words of Switchfoot - "Don't close your eyes... This is your life... Is it everything you dreamed that it would be...?

One thing's always for sure - And so we wait... again. Kind of like watching water boil. Or watching the sundial, waiting for the shadow to creep to the hour you've been dreaming of. But now we wait with more hope than we've felt in a long time, and it feels nice for a change.

Imagine the ...

2008-07-24T22:05:00.004-05:00

The following is our latest news (written by Laura).

Hello family and friends!

We have recently been made aware of some changes within Bethany’s China program and we wanted to share them with you. As most of you know by now, the wait times for adopting a healthy infant from China have drastically increased since we started this journey. If things continue as they have been, their best estimate for us to receive our child would be spring of 2015. Yes…another 7 years. To say that this road has been excruciatingly hard would be an understatement. At times I have wanted to quit because I just can’t take the pursuit of another child any longer! At times we feel encouraged and feel like we can wait forever until we bring our daughter home. This ride is a roller coaster with many ups and downs along the way. But one thing I am sure of…God led us to China for a reason and I believe that our daughter is there. She may be very different from what we first imagined her to be, but she will be perfect for us. I know it. A friend from the internet once said, “Sometimes your dreams change along the way, but the new ones can be just as good!”

That’s where the next part comes in. We feel we cannot wait in line for a healthy infant any longer. Jay and I have been discussing the possibility of adopting a child with special needs for some time now. I won’t lie and say that the prospect is not scary. After all, every couple wants to give birth to a healthy infant, right? So why would someone go halfway around the world and spend their life’s savings to adopt one who isn’t? I don’t have a logical explanation other than, that is what is right and good. God called us to a life of service and to a life of loving others. This life is not about me…it is about serving “the least of these.” I believe that this is where we have been headed all along… originally we asked for a healthy infant, but God knew better. He has hand-picked Raina and has chosen us to be her family.

We were notified today that the process for accepting a special needs child has changed. Bethany will no longer be receiving agency-specific lists of children 4 times a year. The CCAA has now allowed them to have access to the entire list of special needs children 24/7. We no longer have to be through review to be eligible. We just have some paperwork to do and that’s it! But…that’s the hard part. We need to fill out a very specific list of what needs we are willing to take on. The list is very daunting and can be quite overwhelming. Pray for clarity as we make this decision because whatever you put on that list, you will be matched with. Our agency now has the ability to look at these lists which are updated every few weeks and then match you to a specific child based on what you have requested. That means, once we have our paperwork in, we could be matched AT ANY TIME!!!!!!! It could be weeks, months, years. There is no way to know. There will be no predictability of watching your log-in date like before. Basically, when a child becomes available that Bethany feels fits our criteria, we will get “THE CALL”.

We covet your prayers as we embark on this new step towards becoming parents again. Pray that we will be able to choose the medical needs that we feel most comfortable in taking care of and that we will have peace of mind with that decision. It is at times very scary to us, but we feel that this is where God has led us. We have become passionate about adoption and truly believe that every child deserves to be loved and cared for. I don’t think God would place this desire on our hearts and not give us the strength we will need to raise her. Also, please pray that God would help to provide the finances needed to adopt her. It is a very overwhelming task to raise that much money so quickly…but honestly that has been the least of our worries throughout this whole process. We have been doing our best to put money away weekly into what we lovingly call our “China Fund”. However, if we travel sooner than later, it will not be enough. Pray that God would keep us both healthy and provide me with extra hours at work so that we can continue to save. Pray for our daughter. I know she’s been born…I feel her in my heart and know that because we are open to an older child now and the process will seemingly be quicker, I have every confidence that she is living somewhere in China waiting for her family. I don’t allow myself to think of that very often because the helplessness that it causes makes my heart hurt. Pray that she is receiving good care, good medical care, and that there is someone that loves her and is kind to her. Pray that we will be brought together sooner, rather than later.

You are the nearest and dearest to me and that is why I share from my heart. Our God knows the timing and the details of this all. I trust Him.

With love,
Laura

P.S. I have made a decision that I will no longer be posting the regular CCAA Updates. It has proven negative, and considering our possible future, no longer necessary. We are headed for a new tomorrow... and tomorrow will take care of itself.

CCAA Update 7-2008

2008-07-07T17:49:00.003-05:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 25th, 2006. Another miniscule month of 5 days. Well, "screeching halt" doesn't even begin to describe what has happened. I'm still hopeful to see what happens after the Olympics - but let's just say I won't be expecting much. I have learned to expect the worst from this process - and then find out it's actually even worse than that.

CCAA Update 6-2008 / Part 2

2008-06-16T20:29:00.002-05:00

Well, it's official. The CCAA updated their portal to reflect that they have completed review of LID's through January 31st, 2007! Oh yeah! As anticipated, the review process is moving along at a much faster pace than the referral process (no surprise there). Wasn't sure what was going to happen after the devastation suffered in China over the last couple of months. But it seems that the CCAA is determined to move forward the best that they can. Let's keep it rolling!

CCAA Update 6-2008

2008-06-14T07:53:00.003-05:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 20th, 2006. Back to 8 days. Somewhat of an encouragement that the number of days actually went up, but still dismal progress. There's a rumor out there that January '07 is possibly out of review - let's hope that one's true. 2 more months till the Olympics - we'll be watching with great interest to see what happens after that.

Maria Sue Chapman - Forever

2008-05-22T17:37:00.012-05:00

MARIA SUE CHAPMAN (2003-2008)

"At approximately 5pm on the afternoon of Wednesday May 21st, Maria Sue Chapman, 5 years old and the youngest daughter to Steven and Mary Beth Chapman, was struck in the driveway of the Chapman home in Franklin, TN. Maria was rushed to Vanderbilt Childrens Hospital in Nashville, transported by LifeFlight, but died of her injuries there. Maria was one of the close knit family’s six children and one of their three adopted daughters. Your prayers are needed for all in the Chapman family. This is a family who has so generously loved and given to so many. Just hours before, this close knit family was celebrating the engagement of their oldest daughter Emily Chapman, and were just hours away from a graduation party marking Caleb Chapman's completion of high school. Now, they are preparing to bury a child who blew out 5 candles on a birthday cake less than 10 days ago."

Words cannot begin to describe the grief that I felt when I heard this news. Just 6 days ago, I had the honor of meeting Steven Curtis at Parkview and share a few moments with him. Within those few moments, I was able to clearly see the passion that Steven has for his family. My heart breaks for the entire Chapman family - this is a tragedy that is beyond impossible to understand. I cannot even come close to being able to relate to their level of pain and loss. Although I cannot expect God to help this make sense to us, our prayers for peace and comfort join a host of others as we lift this family before His throne.

If you’d like to catch a glimpse of Maria and express your condolences, check out this link: http://chapmanchannel.typepad.com/inmemoryofmaria/.

In lieu of flowers, the Chapmans request any gifts be directed to http://shaohannahshope.com/maria.

Steven Curtis Chapman @ Parkview

2008-05-19T14:25:00.004-05:00

Last Friday night, we had the privilege of seeing Steven Curtis Chapman at our very own Parkview Christian Church. What an amazing night! Due to demand, he did 2 nights in a row, and he did not disappoint. Laura and I received an incredible gift from an anonymous donor - Someone purchased and donated to us (as an adoptive family) 2 front row seats, along with 2 "meet-and-greet" passes for after the show. I've been a fan of SCC for a very long time, so this came as a humbling surprise to us. We were looking forward to meeting him and sharing with him our investment in Chinese adoption (as he and his wife have also adopted 3 girls from China). What a guy - he took a few minutes to listen to our story, and he encouraged us in our venture. It was so awesome to look at him through a new perspective - that of an adoptive father, not just one of my favorite artists. He was so gracious. He even signed our "Shaoey and Dot" book, "To Raina - God Bless You - Steven". I can't wait to tell her the story of that signature. I don't think I'll ever forget that night.

CCAA Update 5-2008

2008-05-05T14:54:00.003-05:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 12th, 2006. 3 days. Yay. What's next? We actually go in reverse and have to give children back to them?

Review Room Finishes 2006!

2008-04-26T21:15:00.009-05:00

Not sure if I've ever explained the process of being "reviewed". When you're LID, the CCAA basically acknowledges your dossier, recognizes that you are legitimately adopting, and places your file aside to be reviewed at a later date. Eventually, your case is reviewed by their review board, and when your LID is reached, you are "matched" with a child. For the last 3 months, the review process has been stuck at October 31st, 2006. We've become frustrated with the stagnancy of this date and... the waiting continues. We desperately want to be "through review" because it may open up some options for us in terms of waiting children. Well, the CCAA has finally updated their web portal to reflect that they are now officially through review up to December 31st, 2006. This is excellent news - they blasted through 2 months at once. With a September 2007 LID, we are still 9 months away from being reviewed, but it is at least one step closer. We anticipate that January through April 2007 will be long months for the board to get through review because of the rule changes that went into effect on May 1st, 2007 and the windfall of dossiers that were logged in prior to that date. But after that, with the amount of submitted dossiers drastically falling, we should sail quickly towards September.

CCAA Update 4-2008

2008-04-08T17:09:00.004-05:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 9th, 2006. That makes 5 days this month. And that's all I have to say about that...

Costa Rica - Medical Mission

2008-03-22T21:26:00.003-05:00

My wife Laura just left for Costa Rica. She is participating in a medical mission with a team from our church, Parkview Christian Church. They will be providing medical care to the poverty-stricken people in the surrounding area of Parkview's sister church, Centro Christo Alabanza. This is a trip that Laura has longed to be a part of since hearing of it - and I can't begin to describe how proud I am of her! She has been given the opportunity to use her professional skills as a ministry to those much less fortunate than we are. And although medical missions is a passion that has hidden itself within her for some time, I am convinced that our pursuit of adoption has contributed to shaping her heart even further in this area. I am sure that she will return a changed person - someone I will continue to fall deeper in love with every day. Leaving me and the boys proved a difficult task, but in the long run, we will all be better people because of her sacrifice. Isn't she amazing?

8 Ain't So Great

2008-03-06T18:18:00.011-06:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 4th, 2006. This again makes only 8 days of referrals this month. Wanna know something interesting? The 2008 Summer Olympics will begin on August 8th, 2008 (8-8-08) with the opening ceremony commencing at 8:08:08 pm CST (China Standard Time) at the Beijing National Stadium in Beijing, People's Republic of China. The number 8 is associated with prosperity and confidence in Chinese culture. So how does 8 measure up in my book? I'm beginning to hate 8.

Ni Hao, Kai-Lan

2008-02-10T16:01:00.002-06:00

Nickolodeon Jr. has just introduced a new program - and although it is now just a little bit young for our boys, it is a show that we are excited about. It is called "Ni Hao, Kai-Lan". The show is a play-along, think-along series that weaves together Chinese language and culture, preschool-relatable stories, and interactivity, with Kai-lan as your intimate friend and playmate! Here's a little bit of what it's all about: "Ni hao!" means "Hi" in Chinese--and that's how Kai-lan greets you every day! Kai-lan Chow is an exuberant Chinese-American preschooler, almost 6, who wants you to come play with her and her best friends. Kai-lan's world is infused with Chinese culture and is brimming with magical sights and sounds, and everywhere you turn there's something amazing and beautiful to see. Along the way, she and her bilingual buddies speak in English and Chinese, but they always need kids' help to find creative solutions to the daily dilemmas that come their way! As "Dora the Explorer" is to Spanish - so is "Ni Hao, Kai-Lan" to Chinese. Check it out!

CCAA Update 2-2008

2008-02-10T15:48:00.001-06:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their website with referrals through December 27, 2005. That means that this last month saw a whopping 8 days (although with the entire year of 2007 having an average of only 6.9 days per month, this was actually an improvement). Let's hope that this is at least a small sign of good things to come.

Concurrent Adoption Policy Change?

2008-01-11T12:46:00.001-06:00

A few months back, the CCAA relaxed their long-standing policy on concurrent adoptions. They had always stated that once you began the adoption process in China, that you were "locked-out" from pursuing another adoption simultaneously elsewhere. They have since reviewed that policy and now allow it (because of the enormous backlog). Bethany Christian Services has also had a long-standing policy forbidding concurrent adoptions. They too are now in the process of reviewing that policy for their China families. Our social worker expects a decision in the very near future. We are not sure what this would mean for us in particular, but it certainly can't hurt to have yet another option open to us. And the puzzle becomes yet more interesting.

CCAA Update 1-2008

2008-01-06T19:35:00.001-06:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their website with referrals through December 19, 2005. As you can see, that means only 5 days were referred for this month. I could go on and on about this for days, but what's the point. I cannot lie - at times, it would seem easier to admit defeat and withdraw from the program. This week, we will be meeting with our social worker to discuss our case. We'll see what comes of it, although to say that we have high expectations would be a slight untruth. We do not have any concrete plans to make any drastic changes but in the very near future we will be exploring any and all options we may have within the China program. I will try to keep you updated with what takes place, but please know, that sometimes just typing out these words gets more and more difficult to do. We have become all too familiar with what can only be described as "referral-time blues". It's kinda funny - you really wouldn't want to be inside our household during the first week of the month...

Christmas in China

2007-12-26T18:28:00.001-06:00

With Christmas season upon us, I thought I'd share a little tidbit about the celebration of Christmas within China. Christians in China celebrate by lighting their houses with beautiful paper lanterns and decorating their Christmas trees, which they call "Trees of Light," with paper chains, paper flowers, and paper lanterns. Chinese Children hang muslin stockings and await a visit from Santa Claus, whom they call Dun Che Lao Ren (dwyn-chuh-lau-oh-run) which means "Christmas Old Man." Since the vast majority of the Chinese people practice Buddhism, not Christianity, the main winter festival in China is the Chinese New Year which takes place toward the end of January. Now officially called the "Spring Festival," it is a time when children receive new clothing, eat luxurious meals, receive new toys, and enjoy firecracker displays. An important aspect of the New Year celebration is the recognition of ancestors. Portraits and paintings of ancestors are brought out and hung in the main room of the home. The celebration of Christmas, although still thought to be a very "Christian" and "western" holiday, is a slowly growing trend within China's borders.

Love Without Boundaries

2007-12-21T12:49:00.001-06:00

There is an organization in China called Love Without Boundaries. It is an organization made up strictly of volunteers who have committed themselves to donating their time and resources in order to better the lives of orphans living within China's orphanages. Volunteers give of themselves in a number of selfless capacities. It is a heartbreaking yet heartwarming organization worth taking a look at.

Check out their official website at http://www.lovewithoutboundaries.com/index.php.

You can also check out their blog (which is incredible) at http://lwbchinablog.blogspot.com/.

Inspiring!

CCAA Update 12-2007

2007-12-05T22:13:00.000-06:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their website with referrals through December 14, 2005. I would like to congratulate those families now receiving their referrals, having waited about a year longer than they originally believed. But I must admit, I am extremely disappointed in the referral of only 6 days this month. Well, it's official. We have now passed the two year waiting point from LID to referral - (i.e. when referrals are released in January 2008, those with December 15-31, 2005 will have waited 25 months.) This is a sad milestone that noone wanted to reach, and only serves to make the wait all that much more excruciating for the rest of us. The discouragement with this process continues to permeate our lives - Oh God, please help us to lean on You for the strength that we know we do not have. Give us clear direction for our future and let us receive the Peace that certainly passes our own understanding - (because we simply do not understand this).

Beijing 2008 Olympic Games

2007-12-04T16:22:00.000-06:00

You should know by now that the 2008 Summer Olympic Games are being held in Beijing, China. This actually is pretty exciting. The people of China, their culture being one of the oldest civilizations on earth, will be on a global stage for the world to experience. I have always loved the Olympic Games, but with Beijing, our household will be embracing the games with a fervor we have not had before. Let the games begin! Mark it down - August 8-24, 2008.

The official site of Beijing2008 - http://en.beijing2008.cn/

Did You Know ...? Hill & McGraw

2007-11-10T08:34:00.000-06:00

Did you know that country music superstars Faith Hill and Tim McGraw are not only a beautiful and famous married couple, but were also themselves both adopted as children? From time to time I will try to post interesting notes about adoption, perhaps including those who are beautiful and famous. :)~

Another Brief Glimpse Into Madness

2007-11-08T18:21:00.000-06:00

With the impending closing in on the 24 month wait from LID to referral, Rumor Queen's site has gone crazy with posts from bewildered and discouraged people. There was a posting from an adoption agency on the projected wait time, the reasons behind it, and what the appropriate response should be from all involved. Rumor Queen herself blogged about this original posting with her own response to each key point. The following is from her blog. Get ready - this is a definite brain ache!

November 8th, 2007
"As has been reported in the forum, a respected agency has done some research, and sent a letter to their clients with some answers. The agency is clear to say that what they are saying is what they believe is true. I’m going to do this in bullet points, with my thoughts in italics.

Abandonment is down. Farmers and low income city residents who have one female child get nationwide medical and retirement insurance. This is part of a drive to try to balance the female population. (I agree with this statement, there are lots of incentives for people to keep their girls. I’m not sure abandonment is down as much as we are being led to believe, but I agree that abandonments are happening in some areas less than they did in the past.)

Some orphanages still have many children. The agency reporting seems to think that in some cases this is because the orphanage directors saw other orphanage directors face severe punishment in the Hunan scandal. (We’ve talked about this as well, that some directors are now afraid to send paperwork because of the way the directors were treated in the Hunan scandal. I’m told the CCAA smoothed that over by issuing clear procedures, and assuring directors that if the procedures were followed as outlined then the directors could not be prosecuted later. But, maybe some of them weren’t convinced.)

Some orphanage directors do keep kids just to keep the orphanage open, or to keep receiving government funding. But some orphanage directors are acting in the best interest of the children in their care and are working to place all of the children that they can place. (I agree with this statement, too. Some orphanages are overflowing, some are almost empty. I’ll also say that some are widely using foster care, too.)

The Civil Affairs Ministry began requiring police reports documetning a child’s abandonment status and this has caused more work for the SWI’s and the local police departments. (We’ve talked about this as well, after the Hunan scandal some rules were changed, and one of them was that an abandoned child had to have a police report when found or they could not be adopted internationally.)

Domestic adoption is up. The average “donation” paid for a domestic adoption is close to $6,000. Plus the costs to prepare paperwork are not as expensive. (I’m not sure this is the case in all provinces, as I’m aware of an orphanage where the total costs to adopt domestically are around 2500 yuan which is around $330. Perhaps the higher fee involves those who go through the CCAA instead of going straight to the orphanage? I’m sure that $6,000 is there in some cases or the agency would not have reported it. It really bothers me that there seems to be this “competition” between domestic and IA though. If domestic adoption can handle the orphan population then there should not be IA. If domestic can not, then there should be IA. And cost should not come into play. From what I’ve been told, domestic adoption is indeed up, but not in enough numbers come close to emptying the orphanages, so IA is still needed. Both should be able to co-exist without monetary competition. )

In regards to the Olympics, the agency feels that China is of the mind to just not rock the boat about anything until the Olympics are over. Their priority is to finish the Olympics with no problems cropping up. They are not going to try to force an SWI to send files now because it’s safer to do nothing and not risk drawing negative attention to the program. (While I personally think the Olympics are playing a larger role in the slowdown, I appreciate that perhaps the role is more subtle. This agency’s statement is actually better than my own thoughts, because in my version there is no reason to try to improve things once the Olympics are over. In this version there seems to be a possibility that things may improve after the Olympics.)

The agency feels that the CCAA does care about the wait, but they are not as powerful as we think they are. They are at the mercy of the provinces and orphanages right now, they get whatever is sent to them and cannot demand more. (I’m still digesting this one. What I’ve heard previously is that the CCAA has their hands tied by the higher ups telling them what they can and can’t do. This version has their hands tied by the orphanages and provinces. The end result is the same though, the CCAA is doing the best they can and they are not the bad guy.)

The CCAA was created in 1996 with a workload of 3,000 placements a year. China wanted to send less babies than South Korea and Russia. In 1997 the CCAA placed more than South Korea and there were discussions about it. China became proud that families liked their children, and the number was raised to more than 10,000. (Yes, and from what I heard someone changed their mind about the “pride” part of that back in 2005 and thus things started slowing down.)

China is the only country who places mostly abandoned children. Other countries place children with known birth parents or extended families. As China develops, their IA program may evolve into a system similar to that of other countries. This will likely take a while, but there is a good chance that it will happen. (Wow. That is completely new information. And could be a very big deal.)

Families who do not mind waiting will get a referral. The wait will be four years, worst case scenario. The agency is clear that they trust these statements. (I completely believe the first part, that if you are prepared to wait you’ll eventually get a referral (assuming you are still eligible when the time comes.) I do not think that the CCAA or China plans to completely stop the program any time soon. However, I wonder how they can be sure about a worst case scenario. That being said, my own feelings have been that the worst is probably going to be somewhere around the four year mark as well. The math can (and does) take us much farther, but I just can’t bring myself to believe that it will go much over four to four and a half years.)

I think I’ve hit all of the main points. Most of it is stuff we’ve been over dozens of times before, but it is nice to have a respected agency put their two cents in.
I think that the only truly new “news” is the future possibility of China allowing children with known families to be adopted.
The four year maximum thing has come to us a few times before, so it’s not brand new, but having this particular affirmation of that does give it more weight (to me, at least)."

CCAA Update 11-2007

2007-11-05T17:24:00.000-06:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their website with referrals through December 8, 2005. So, as you can see, they made it through 8 days of December this month - we'll see what happens next month, when the program will hit the dreaded 24 month mark between LID's and referrals. I want to say congratulations to all the new moms and dads who are finally going to meet their babies.

Someone To Hold Our Hand

2007-11-01T19:41:00.000-05:00

Great news! I mentioned in a past post that we've been without a social worker through our adoption agency since our previous SW left about five weeks ago. We received notice yesterday that we indeed have a new case worker. We are familiar with her and couldn't be more thrilled to be working with her. She comes very highly recommended and we look forward to our future partnership. This is a little piece of happiness in an otherwise long line of "hurry up and wait".

Bella ... Is ... Beautiful

2007-11-01T19:12:00.000-05:00

A new movie has just been released called "Bella". It is a small, independent film release - one that, unfortunately, does not have very wide distribution. "Bella" has recently won the coveted People's Choice Award at the highly respected Toronto Film Festival, an award shared by an impressive list of past films, such as: "Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon", "American Beauty", and "Life Is Beautiful". This is also a film that is being promoted on adoption websites, as well as many pro-life organizations. Laura and I got a babysitter Tuesday night and we went to see the film. I have to tell you, this movie is amazing. The theme of the film is so beautifully portrayed on the screen - it's message comes shining through with compassion and incredible creativity. The director is extremely talented and the acting is superb. With a story of love, sacrifice, and redemption - this is an absolutely wonderful film. Go see "Bella" - it is truly beautiful.

A Brief Glimpse Into Madness

2007-10-13T09:24:00.000-05:00

I posted a few days ago that I would soon be giving some sort of explanation about the prospective future of the China wait times. This is an extremely complicated issue that cannot possibly be explained in one post, but I found a fairly good summary on ChinaAdoptTalk (aka "Rumor Queen"). I recognize that this article can at times get very confusing for you (trust me, it's confusing even to me), but give it a shot and ask me any questions you may have - I'll try to answer them. The following synopsis is from RQ's blog.
BTW - some of the acronyms listed within the article include: CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs), LID (Log-In-Date), SN (Special Needs), NSN (Non-Special Needs), USCIS (U.S. Citizen & Immigration Services), IA (International Adoption), SWI (Social Welfare Institute-[orphanage]).

The immediate future - rumors for and against a speed up
"We all know that the CCAA told multiple agencies and countries during their tour that things will pick up after the first of the year. Specifically, they will do 15 days at a time (or take two calendar months to do a LID month, there were several variations that said the same thing).
As I’ve noted before, it appears that in order to do 15 days at a time they will need to increase the number of NSN referrals issued per month in order to make that happen.
There has been a lot of speculation on whether this will happen. People remember that the CCAA has told agencies other things in the past that didn’t turn out to be true, and so there is a good deal of mis-trust about this statement.
I’ve received a few emails from people who claim to have special knowledge. Though they are a bit cryptic about their actual source, it appears from what little they do say, that their sources are probably different from each other. And yet they all have a few things in common. The most notable being that the 15 days per month are not going to happen. Putting them all together, I believe the main points are:
The ceiling/quota next year will be even lower than this year (which is lower than last year’s ceiling/quota).
The COA (which is part of the State Department?) is frowning on agencies that are trying to be vague about the wait times for China.
Two weeks (15 days) of referrals will not happen. They may get close a few times, but do not expect it to happen on a regular basis.
The Special Needs Program is now the primary focus, and they are trying to ramp the NSN program down as quickly as possible without it becoming a media event or having an outcry about human rights issues.

What does this mean?
I don’t know. I have people with “special insider information” saying both things - that the ceiling/quota is going to be higher next year from some and that it will go down yet again from others. The supposed sources for the good news seems to be agencies and facilitators and for the not-so-good news seems to mostly be from U.S. official channels. How would our State Department or USCIS or COA know these things? I don’t know.
Also, at least two agencies seem to be basing their speed up statements on the fact that they know that the CCAA is has matched their clients pretty far out ahead of time. As I’ve said before, I’m sure that the CCAA is matching some families far ahead of time, but I don’t know that they have matched everyone ahead of time. I have some circumstantial evidence from the most recent batch that tells me that they are not matching everyone early. I don’t know anything for sure, but if I’m correct on that then at least two agencies are basing their speed up hopes on incomplete information. Just because the CCAA has matched their families pretty far in advance, it does not mean the CCAA has matched all families so far in advance.
One thing I have heard quite a bit of that seems to be in agreement from all sides: Current SN vs NSN consulate appointments seem to be more SN than NSN. Also, many agencies (not all agencies, many agencies) are reporting that they are now sending more families to China to complete a SN adoption than they are in the NSN program. I believe that at this time the SN program is bigger than the NSN program. Not in terms of dossiers, of course, but in terms of children actually being adopted each month. (As a side note, the State Department numbers should be out soon for the fiscal year just ended, it will be interesting to see what those numbers say. I wish they broke them down by program, but I guess we take what we can get at this point.)
I believe that December 2005 is about 60% the size of November 2005. I also believe that the CCAA should be able to get through December in three months (with maybe a few December LIDs included in a fourth month that would be mostly made up of January LIDs). This assumes that they continue to do about the same number of NSN referrals per calendar month as they have been doing. If they increase that number then it could be less than three months, if they reduce that number even more, then, well, I don’t want to go there.
As far as speed up rumors, let’s look at a bit of history. Over the past two years we have had at least two big events where we were SURE things were going to speed up in the next month or two. First there was the promise last summer that the CCAA didn’t want the wait to go over a year. We were certain things would speed up since we were so close to that year mark - and even when we hit the year mark there were agencies saying it wouldn’t go over 14 months, that the CCAA was working hard to keep the wait from continueing to grow. I believed them, as did many others.
Then, last fall we had the combined rumor of new SWI’s being added to the IA program in the spring plus Brian Stuy’s statement last September that we were currently at the longest wait times. And then there was the waiting dad with a December of ‘05 LID who asked the CCAA director face to face when he would get his referral and was told December. (We all thought it meant last December, none of us thought it was possible it would be the following December.)
So last fall we were all pretty much believing things would speed up, which didn’t happen. And then came January ‘07 and they put the brakes on even more.
There was also the rumor from agencies that the CCAA wasn’t going to let the wait get to the point where people would have to redo their I-171H, but the CCAA later made it pretty clear that they were not concerned about that and if we didn’t like it we should look to our government to change, not to them to shorten the wait.
So where does this leave us now? We’ve basically been promised (again) that things are going to pick up a bit. Soon. And this time we are hearing it from the CCAA (told to multiple agencies and governments over the summer) as well as agencies continuing to get this word now from the CCAA. Some of us interpret the CCAA’s statement to governments and agencies to mean this next batch (since we are through with November) and some people interpret it to mean the batch to arrive in December (the first batch of the CCAA’s next fiscal year) and some people interpret it to mean the batch to arrive in January (since that’s the first of 2008). And many of us feel like Charlie Brown and the football - not going to fall for it again. But then, hope springs eternal, and maybe they are telling the truth this time and the football won’t be yanked away yet again.

To summarize:
We know that if things stay exactly the same then LID days per batch should increase because we know there aren’t as many people logged in during the next few months.
We’ve been promised 15 days at a time (two months to do one month, etc), which would seem to mean an increase in the number of referrals per month.
There are rumors out there that the ceiling/quota will indeed be higher next year, which means maybe they are going to pull it off.
There are also rumors that the ceiling/quota next year will be lower, which would be very very very bad.
We may know this month, or next month, but at the latest we should know by the January batch whether this rumored speed up is going to happen."

This entry was posted on ChinaAdoptTalk (aka RQ) on Tuesday, October 9th, 2007.

I realize that this article may have caused more confusion than it actually helped. Welcome to the club.

Raina Beach - Rarotonga, Cook Islands

2007-10-11T21:54:00.000-05:00

There's a group of islands in the South Pacific near Fiji called the Cook Islands. One of these islands is called Rarotonga, and on this island, there is an area called Raina Beach. I found this picture of it while searching the internet, and was amazed at the fact that I recognize this place. I've never been there (although by the looks of the photo, it's now on our list of places to visit before we die). I know Rarotonga from our favorite show - Survivor. A few seasons ago, Survivor was located on the Cook Islands, and it's hard to forget a place that beautiful. Someday maybe we can visit Rarotonga and Raina Beach. I can hardly envision a more breathtaking scene - standing on that sand, named with a beautiful name. The name of our daughter. Maybe she'd like to see it too.

There's Always Next Year

2007-10-09T20:00:00.000-05:00

As a lifelong fan of the almighty Chicago White Sox, I just couldn't let the opportunity pass by to say congratulations to the Cubbies on yet another year of futility. I believe next year will be the magnificent 100 year anniversary of the last World Series title for the north side's loveable losers. Nothing could've been more satisfying than witnessing the Cubs' demise against the Diamondbacks. Ah, Yes - perpetual failure never tasted quite so sweet. I think this photo just about says it better than I ever could.

CCAA Update 10-2007

2007-10-09T19:39:00.000-05:00

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their website with referrals through November 30, 2005. I haven't done much explaining about the reasons behind the extraordinary delays in the China process, but I will post a detailed synopsis coming soon. There is much speculation about the slowdown (with more theories than we can count), and we are left to sift through the rumors and determine what we feel is truth and what we feel is empty. The one thing we know for sure is that we don't know much. More later.

Life Without Limbs

2007-10-07T18:40:00.000-05:00

We've recently gone through quite a transition in regards to our church life, and we've begun attending Parkview Christian Church in Orland Park. (There will probably be more shared about this change in the near future.) Last week, there was a guest speaker named Nick Vujicic. I have to tell you that his story is simply incredible - you have to see it to believe it. He shared for about 20 minutes during last weekend's service. It was so inspiring to hear about Nick and his ministry. Believe me, I won't soon forget him.

Nick's official site is http://www.lifewithoutlimbs.org/

Because Kids Matter To God

2007-10-07T18:02:00.000-05:00

My sons have gotten involved in something that we are very proud of. We started bringing them a few weeks ago to an area church that has a great AWANA program. They are now "Sparks" and they are having a blast. AWANA is something that had a profound impact on my own life as a kid - in fact, it sometimes seems that most of the Bible scripture that I still have memorized to this very day was birthed out of my own experiences in AWANA. When Wednesday rolls around each week, they can't wait to go. They are doing wonderfully with their verses, and they absolutely love it. How awesome it is to see our boys embracing the Word of God in a way that they enjoy so much!

A Conversation With "J"

2007-09-28T17:11:00.000-05:00

A couple of weeks ago, I had to do a service call at a school district in Skokie, Illinois. I've done a bunch of work there in the past, but it had been some time since I'd been there. I knew I wanted to get a chance to talk to a woman who works for the district (I'll call her "J") who has 2 biological sons and adopted a little girl from China about 4 or 5 years ago. On a break, I got the opportunity to make my way over to her office, and she was able to sit down with me for awhile. When I shared with her our great news about Raina, she was so filled with joy for us. "J" gave me some very practical advice about the wait - it was so encouraging to talk to someone who has been there. I was even able to see pictures of her daughter - she is absolutely beautiful! "J" took the time to show she really cares about our journey, which is something that means a lot to me.

Thanks "J" ....... One day our family will look very much like yours. Cool, huh?

Winds Of Change

2007-09-27T18:43:00.000-05:00

We received word yesterday that our social worker (who we've been working with since the beginning of our adoption process) is leaving our adoption agency. We are assuming that we will soon be notified of a replacement SW to take over our case. We are so thankful that God, in His perfect timing, saw to it that our dossier made it to China and was logged in prior to this change taking place. Looking forward to this next chapter of waiting, only with a new partner.

LID - A Date To Remember

2007-09-11T19:37:00.000-05:00

This is the date we will remember. This is the date that China knows who we are. This is the date that makes her "real". That's right - we have our long awaited Log-In-Date! We received word today that we were logged-in to China's adoption system on September 4, 2007. This date signifies so much. It is basically our "starting point". From this point on, we will endure the process knowing that we have a place in the waiting line - the very long waiting line. Looking back to what it took to accomplish this feat is quite rewarding, really. Knowing that nine months of preparation has finally paid off with "LID 9-4-2007" is just enough for right now. Yet our joy at the news of our LID is tempered by reality. We do not know what the next few years will bring. We know that we will face plenty of heartache, plenty of frustration. Some days we think we can wait forever. Some days we think we can't possibly wait as long as it's going to take. But someday Raina will be here. We may probably never be able to express in words how this process has changed us. For now, our LID is just a date to remember - a date to mark on the calender. But this date means so much more. "9-4-2007" means that one day a little girl will be born. A little girl whose parents may not be able to care for her. A little girl who will be painfully abandoned and left alone. A little girl who will long for arms to hold her, for a family that will never let her go. A little girl with black hair and a beautiful smile. A little girl named Raina.

September 4, 2007. Yes. A date to remember, forever.

DOSSIER TO CHINA!!!

2007-09-01T13:44:00.000-05:00

Oh My Gosh!!! I can hardly believe this! We just opened our mailbox today to find an envelope from Bethany Grand Rapids. Opening the envelope and expecting nothing but another bill for the latest fees, we were stunned to read the following words: "Your dossier was sent to China on August 29, 2007". I cannot begin to describe the overwhelming joy that went through me and Laura upon receiving this news. This tiny step may mean little-to-nothing to anyone else, but the DTC is incredibly important to us. It means that hopefully within a few weeks, we will have the pinnacle date to this point in our process - wait, can it actually be, yes, it is - our Log-In-Date (LID)! Having begun our official adoption application process with Bethany in January, this little bit of good news has been an extremely long time in coming, and it lets us know that we have not been forgotten on this long road to Raina. We are simply bursting! We want to send a huge "Thank You" to all who have shown such interest and supported us in prayer and friendship up to now. We don't pretend that the waiting will get any easier - in fact, we know that with a projected 2 to 3 years until referral, each month that passes by will become all the more excruciating. Still, this small "next step" means just about the whole world to us right now, and we intend to enjoy the glorious feeling of knowing that we are finally DTC!!! Yeeaaahhhh!

Another Man's Treasure

2007-08-31T16:47:00.000-05:00

I was working at a high-rise condo building downtown this week, and I came across something in the trash. It was laying on top of a small dumpster with a bunch of empty boxes piled on it. When I pulled it out of the pile, this is what I found. Can you believe that this painting was thrown out by someone? Neither could I. I asked the building maintenance people if they wanted it, and they said "Go ahead, take it." I brought it home, showed it to Laura, and it matches our family room colors exact. It's as if the artist painted it for us. We still have to find the perfect spot for it, but I guess one man's trash is...

How Long Is Too Long?

2007-08-30T20:00:00.000-05:00

When you have an upcoming vacation, you anticipate the coming days with excitement. Even the waiting can seem enjoyable, because you have something to look forward to. But who plans a vacation 3+ years ahead of time? When your target is that far away, sometimes it seems that it would be better to simply put it out of your mind - the waiting may just drive you mad. My friends, this is our journey to Raina. We read about China, we study about China, we talk with others who are waiting to go to China, just like us - we never want to put our daughter out of our minds. Yet our lives go on and on right here like they always do. We are just entering the hardest part. Sometimes the waiting hits us - "Man, how are we supposed to do this?"

High School Musical 2

2007-08-30T19:36:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I know I'll get a lot of raised eyebrows on this one, but our family has been nuts for High School Musical 2. It seems a little crazy that we enjoy the HSM world as much as we do, but honestly, we can't get enough of it. Reminds me so much of my youth with Grease. The films really are fun and the music and dancing are totally worth checking out. Don't knock it - you might love it too.

My New Wallpaper

2007-08-28T20:57:00.000-05:00

Last month we went to Hollywood Beach, Florida. I snapped this pic of our boys by the beach - I love it so much, it's my new desktop wallpaper. That's Evan on the left, and Colin on the right. Also, after an evening of rain, I raced to grab my camera when we spotted a rainbow over the calm and pristine Atlantic ocean. It just so happens that Laura's beautiful face takes over the beauty of the background. Definitely one of the most incredible moments I've ever captured on camera.

Good To Be Here

2007-08-28T19:23:00.000-05:00

Someday, we hope to have a little girl in our house. She will not look like us on the outside, but her name will have been written on our hearts forever and she will become part of our family. We have just submitted our dossier to Bethany Grand Rapids, and we are now awaiting our DTC (dossier-to-China) and the all-important LID (log-in-date) with the CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs). We will try to share with you the many ups and downs along the way during this achingly long process that we refer to as "Waiting for Raina." (The Chinese characters above represent the name "Raina".)