One Year

Well, today marks one year to the day that we were logged-in to China's adoption program. One year of ups... one year of downs... one year of anticipation... one year of heartache. Wow, I can remember looking at the date - 9/4/2007 - with much excitement. And then we waited. And waited. And waited. I don't think that I'll ever be able to explain in human words what this year has been like for us. Only those who have waited for their own adoption journey could possibly understand. And yet, for some reason, we've come to believe that Raina is born, and she has had an unquestionably harder year. One of very little ups... a great many downs... very little hope... and much heartache. But, little does she know that her mom and dad wait here in Chicagoland, USA - desperately clinging to the Hope that she has yet to experience. Hold on little girl... for just a little longer.

Unbelievable

All expectations blown away - without a doubt, the most amazing spectacle of performance art ever witnessed on such a grand scale. China succeeded in erasing the slate of comparison for Olympic opening ceremonies forever. Completely awe-inspiring, emotionally uplifting - Chinese pride put the pedal to the "medal". Couldn't help but watch with tears - we've finally seen what the country of China has been preparing for for the last decade - all culminating on one glorious night in Beijing. No words to describe the beauty, no where to even begin. Unbelievable.

08-08-08

Oh, yeah... Let the games begin!

And So We Wait... Again.

Well, we have officially submitted our COP paperwork to Bethany Grand Rapids, and it has been accepted. As stated in the last posting, we have no idea of knowing any sort of timeframe for this next phase. Part of me suspects that we'll never really be ready for that phone call - No matter when it comes, our lives will immediately be placed upon that turbulent path we've become so familiar with. The other part of me thinks that we've never been more ready for that phone call - No matter when it comes, our lives will immediately be placed upon that wonderful path that we've waited for for so long. It's kind of like my best friend Dan - he has a turbulent, yet wonderful path ahead of him. Will he ever really be ready for what lies ahead? Who knows. In the words of Switchfoot - "Don't close your eyes... This is your life... Is it everything you dreamed that it would be...?

One thing's always for sure - And so we wait... again. Kind of like watching water boil. Or watching the sundial, waiting for the shadow to creep to the hour you've been dreaming of. But now we wait with more hope than we've felt in a long time, and it feels nice for a change.

Imagine the ...

The following is our latest news (written by Laura).

Hello family and friends!

We have recently been made aware of some changes within Bethany’s China program and we wanted to share them with you. As most of you know by now, the wait times for adopting a healthy infant from China have drastically increased since we started this journey. If things continue as they have been, their best estimate for us to receive our child would be spring of 2015. Yes…another 7 years. To say that this road has been excruciatingly hard would be an understatement. At times I have wanted to quit because I just can’t take the pursuit of another child any longer! At times we feel encouraged and feel like we can wait forever until we bring our daughter home. This ride is a roller coaster with many ups and downs along the way. But one thing I am sure of…God led us to China for a reason and I believe that our daughter is there. She may be very different from what we first imagined her to be, but she will be perfect for us. I know it. A friend from the internet once said, “Sometimes your dreams change along the way, but the new ones can be just as good!”

That’s where the next part comes in. We feel we cannot wait in line for a healthy infant any longer. Jay and I have been discussing the possibility of adopting a child with special needs for some time now. I won’t lie and say that the prospect is not scary. After all, every couple wants to give birth to a healthy infant, right? So why would someone go halfway around the world and spend their life’s savings to adopt one who isn’t? I don’t have a logical explanation other than, that is what is right and good. God called us to a life of service and to a life of loving others. This life is not about me…it is about serving “the least of these.” I believe that this is where we have been headed all along… originally we asked for a healthy infant, but God knew better. He has hand-picked Raina and has chosen us to be her family.

We were notified today that the process for accepting a special needs child has changed. Bethany will no longer be receiving agency-specific lists of children 4 times a year. The CCAA has now allowed them to have access to the entire list of special needs children 24/7. We no longer have to be through review to be eligible. We just have some paperwork to do and that’s it! But…that’s the hard part. We need to fill out a very specific list of what needs we are willing to take on. The list is very daunting and can be quite overwhelming. Pray for clarity as we make this decision because whatever you put on that list, you will be matched with. Our agency now has the ability to look at these lists which are updated every few weeks and then match you to a specific child based on what you have requested. That means, once we have our paperwork in, we could be matched AT ANY TIME!!!!!!! It could be weeks, months, years. There is no way to know. There will be no predictability of watching your log-in date like before. Basically, when a child becomes available that Bethany feels fits our criteria, we will get “THE CALL”.

We covet your prayers as we embark on this new step towards becoming parents again. Pray that we will be able to choose the medical needs that we feel most comfortable in taking care of and that we will have peace of mind with that decision. It is at times very scary to us, but we feel that this is where God has led us. We have become passionate about adoption and truly believe that every child deserves to be loved and cared for. I don’t think God would place this desire on our hearts and not give us the strength we will need to raise her. Also, please pray that God would help to provide the finances needed to adopt her. It is a very overwhelming task to raise that much money so quickly…but honestly that has been the least of our worries throughout this whole process. We have been doing our best to put money away weekly into what we lovingly call our “China Fund”. However, if we travel sooner than later, it will not be enough. Pray that God would keep us both healthy and provide me with extra hours at work so that we can continue to save. Pray for our daughter. I know she’s been born…I feel her in my heart and know that because we are open to an older child now and the process will seemingly be quicker, I have every confidence that she is living somewhere in China waiting for her family. I don’t allow myself to think of that very often because the helplessness that it causes makes my heart hurt. Pray that she is receiving good care, good medical care, and that there is someone that loves her and is kind to her. Pray that we will be brought together sooner, rather than later.

You are the nearest and dearest to me and that is why I share from my heart. Our God knows the timing and the details of this all. I trust Him.

With love,
Laura

P.S. I have made a decision that I will no longer be posting the regular CCAA Updates. It has proven negative, and considering our possible future, no longer necessary. We are headed for a new tomorrow... and tomorrow will take care of itself.

CCAA Update 7-2008

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 25th, 2006. Another miniscule month of 5 days. Well, "screeching halt" doesn't even begin to describe what has happened. I'm still hopeful to see what happens after the Olympics - but let's just say I won't be expecting much. I have learned to expect the worst from this process - and then find out it's actually even worse than that.

CCAA Update 6-2008 / Part 2

Well, it's official. The CCAA updated their portal to reflect that they have completed review of LID's through January 31st, 2007! Oh yeah! As anticipated, the review process is moving along at a much faster pace than the referral process (no surprise there). Wasn't sure what was going to happen after the devastation suffered in China over the last couple of months. But it seems that the CCAA is determined to move forward the best that they can. Let's keep it rolling!

CCAA Update 6-2008

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 20th, 2006. Back to 8 days. Somewhat of an encouragement that the number of days actually went up, but still dismal progress. There's a rumor out there that January '07 is possibly out of review - let's hope that one's true. 2 more months till the Olympics - we'll be watching with great interest to see what happens after that.

Maria Sue Chapman - Forever

MARIA SUE CHAPMAN (2003-2008)

"At approximately 5pm on the afternoon of Wednesday May 21st, Maria Sue Chapman, 5 years old and the youngest daughter to Steven and Mary Beth Chapman, was struck in the driveway of the Chapman home in Franklin, TN. Maria was rushed to Vanderbilt Childrens Hospital in Nashville, transported by LifeFlight, but died of her injuries there. Maria was one of the close knit family’s six children and one of their three adopted daughters. Your prayers are needed for all in the Chapman family. This is a family who has so generously loved and given to so many. Just hours before, this close knit family was celebrating the engagement of their oldest daughter Emily Chapman, and were just hours away from a graduation party marking Caleb Chapman's completion of high school. Now, they are preparing to bury a child who blew out 5 candles on a birthday cake less than 10 days ago."

Words cannot begin to describe the grief that I felt when I heard this news. Just 6 days ago, I had the honor of meeting Steven Curtis at Parkview and share a few moments with him. Within those few moments, I was able to clearly see the passion that Steven has for his family. My heart breaks for the entire Chapman family - this is a tragedy that is beyond impossible to understand. I cannot even come close to being able to relate to their level of pain and loss. Although I cannot expect God to help this make sense to us, our prayers for peace and comfort join a host of others as we lift this family before His throne.

If you’d like to catch a glimpse of Maria and express your condolences, check out this link: http://chapmanchannel.typepad.com/inmemoryofmaria/.

In lieu of flowers, the Chapmans request any gifts be directed to http://shaohannahshope.com/maria.

Steven Curtis Chapman @ Parkview

Last Friday night, we had the privilege of seeing Steven Curtis Chapman at our very own Parkview Christian Church. What an amazing night! Due to demand, he did 2 nights in a row, and he did not disappoint. Laura and I received an incredible gift from an anonymous donor - Someone purchased and donated to us (as an adoptive family) 2 front row seats, along with 2 "meet-and-greet" passes for after the show. I've been a fan of SCC for a very long time, so this came as a humbling surprise to us. We were looking forward to meeting him and sharing with him our investment in Chinese adoption (as he and his wife have also adopted 3 girls from China). What a guy - he took a few minutes to listen to our story, and he encouraged us in our venture. It was so awesome to look at him through a new perspective - that of an adoptive father, not just one of my favorite artists. He was so gracious. He even signed our "Shaoey and Dot" book, "To Raina - God Bless You - Steven". I can't wait to tell her the story of that signature. I don't think I'll ever forget that night.

CCAA Update 5-2008

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 12th, 2006. 3 days. Yay. What's next? We actually go in reverse and have to give children back to them?

Review Room Finishes 2006!

Not sure if I've ever explained the process of being "reviewed". When you're LID, the CCAA basically acknowledges your dossier, recognizes that you are legitimately adopting, and places your file aside to be reviewed at a later date. Eventually, your case is reviewed by their review board, and when your LID is reached, you are "matched" with a child. For the last 3 months, the review process has been stuck at October 31st, 2006. We've become frustrated with the stagnancy of this date and... the waiting continues. We desperately want to be "through review" because it may open up some options for us in terms of waiting children. Well, the CCAA has finally updated their web portal to reflect that they are now officially through review up to December 31st, 2006. This is excellent news - they blasted through 2 months at once. With a September 2007 LID, we are still 9 months away from being reviewed, but it is at least one step closer. We anticipate that January through April 2007 will be long months for the board to get through review because of the rule changes that went into effect on May 1st, 2007 and the windfall of dossiers that were logged in prior to that date. But after that, with the amount of submitted dossiers drastically falling, we should sail quickly towards September.

CCAA Update 4-2008

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 9th, 2006. That makes 5 days this month. And that's all I have to say about that...

Costa Rica - Medical Mission

My wife Laura just left for Costa Rica. She is participating in a medical mission with a team from our church, Parkview Christian Church. They will be providing medical care to the poverty-stricken people in the surrounding area of Parkview's sister church, Centro Christo Alabanza. This is a trip that Laura has longed to be a part of since hearing of it - and I can't begin to describe how proud I am of her! She has been given the opportunity to use her professional skills as a ministry to those much less fortunate than we are. And although medical missions is a passion that has hidden itself within her for some time, I am convinced that our pursuit of adoption has contributed to shaping her heart even further in this area. I am sure that she will return a changed person - someone I will continue to fall deeper in love with every day. Leaving me and the boys proved a difficult task, but in the long run, we will all be better people because of her sacrifice. Isn't she amazing?

8 Ain't So Great

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their system with referrals through January 4th, 2006. This again makes only 8 days of referrals this month. Wanna know something interesting? The 2008 Summer Olympics will begin on August 8th, 2008 (8-8-08) with the opening ceremony commencing at 8:08:08 pm CST (China Standard Time) at the Beijing National Stadium in Beijing, People's Republic of China. The number 8 is associated with prosperity and confidence in Chinese culture. So how does 8 measure up in my book? I'm beginning to hate 8.

Ni Hao, Kai-Lan

Nickolodeon Jr. has just introduced a new program - and although it is now just a little bit young for our boys, it is a show that we are excited about. It is called "Ni Hao, Kai-Lan". The show is a play-along, think-along series that weaves together Chinese language and culture, preschool-relatable stories, and interactivity, with Kai-lan as your intimate friend and playmate! Here's a little bit of what it's all about: "Ni hao!" means "Hi" in Chinese--and that's how Kai-lan greets you every day! Kai-lan Chow is an exuberant Chinese-American preschooler, almost 6, who wants you to come play with her and her best friends. Kai-lan's world is infused with Chinese culture and is brimming with magical sights and sounds, and everywhere you turn there's something amazing and beautiful to see. Along the way, she and her bilingual buddies speak in English and Chinese, but they always need kids' help to find creative solutions to the daily dilemmas that come their way! As "Dora the Explorer" is to Spanish - so is "Ni Hao, Kai-Lan" to Chinese. Check it out!

CCAA Update 2-2008

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their website with referrals through December 27, 2005. That means that this last month saw a whopping 8 days (although with the entire year of 2007 having an average of only 6.9 days per month, this was actually an improvement). Let's hope that this is at least a small sign of good things to come.

Concurrent Adoption Policy Change?

A few months back, the CCAA relaxed their long-standing policy on concurrent adoptions. They had always stated that once you began the adoption process in China, that you were "locked-out" from pursuing another adoption simultaneously elsewhere. They have since reviewed that policy and now allow it (because of the enormous backlog). Bethany Christian Services has also had a long-standing policy forbidding concurrent adoptions. They too are now in the process of reviewing that policy for their China families. Our social worker expects a decision in the very near future. We are not sure what this would mean for us in particular, but it certainly can't hurt to have yet another option open to us. And the puzzle becomes yet more interesting.

CCAA Update 1-2008

The CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) has updated their website with referrals through December 19, 2005. As you can see, that means only 5 days were referred for this month. I could go on and on about this for days, but what's the point. I cannot lie - at times, it would seem easier to admit defeat and withdraw from the program. This week, we will be meeting with our social worker to discuss our case. We'll see what comes of it, although to say that we have high expectations would be a slight untruth. We do not have any concrete plans to make any drastic changes but in the very near future we will be exploring any and all options we may have within the China program. I will try to keep you updated with what takes place, but please know, that sometimes just typing out these words gets more and more difficult to do. We have become all too familiar with what can only be described as "referral-time blues". It's kinda funny - you really wouldn't want to be inside our household during the first week of the month...